interesting poems...

Midnight Fenrir · 02-11-2005, 12:53 AM

hear are some cool poems that i found off the enternet.

I'M GLAD I'M A MAN

I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe. I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese. I don't b*tch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts. I can get where I want to - north,south,east, or west.

I don't get wasted after only 2 beers,
And when I do drink I don't end up in tears.
I won't spend hours deciding what to wear.
I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair.

And I don't go around checking my reflection
in everything shiny from every direction.
I don't whine in public and make us leave early,
and when you ask why get all bitter and surly.

I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.
I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back.
I don't carry our differences into the sack

I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you
or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.
I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too.
I know what the time is and I know what to do.

And I honestly think its a privilege for me
to have these two balls and stand when I pee.
I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball.
It's more fun than dealing with women after all.

I won't cry if you say it's not going to work.
I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk.
Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure.
I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.

Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see.
I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery.
I don't get all b*tchy every 28 days.
I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise.

I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!
hear is another

I'M GLAD I'M A WOMAN

I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am.
I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.
I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions.

I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.
And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down.
I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt.
My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut.

And I don't go around "re-adjusting" my crotch.
And yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch.
I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind.
I'm a woman you see - I'm just not that kind!

I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have body hair like shag carpeting.
It dosen't grow in my ears or cover my back.
When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack.

And what's on my head dosen't leave with my comb.
I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome.
Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side.
I'm a woman, you know - I've got far too much pride!

And I honestly think it's a privelege for me,
to have these two boobs and squat when I pee.
I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball.
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.

I won't tell you my wife just does not understand,
or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band.
Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,
then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!

Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see.
Forget all about that old p*nis envy.
I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks.
Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my d*ck.

I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!

i did the man 1 for school with my sexest LA teacher and got lunch detention for a week.

**Foog** · 02-11-2005, 06:27 PM

pretty sexist crap...

**fortunecookieX** · 02-11-2005, 10:34 PM

you should make one about those half man half woman i forgot what you call them.anyways nice peoms

Midnight Fenrir · 02-12-2005, 01:24 AM

yes this is very sexist but i wasnt the one who made them. but a haph man haph woman i think is called a hermafradite (not sure about spelling just sound it out)

**Obfuscate** · 02-12-2005, 01:27 AM

good ryhme and all but someones gona shoot you for those some day I can see it now.

Midnight Fenrir · 02-12-2005, 07:33 AM

hey i get plenty of death threts at school so ya im most likly guna die soon. but o well if some 1 tries to kill me then im takin them with me. i bring a 6 inch swichblade to school for pretection lol.

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02-12-2005, 01:27 AM	#5 (permalink)
Obfuscate Status: Bro Rapist Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Somewhere near something next to this and that Posts: 2,169 Credits: 77 Spent time on board: 2 Days and 21:07:51 Hours Rep Power: 8	good ryhme and all but someones gona shoot you for those some day I can see it now. __________________ "One murder makes a villain, millions a hero. " - Beilby Porteus, Death, A Poem

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02-11-2005, 12:53 AM	#1 (permalink)
Midnight Fenrir Status: Newcomer Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: a magical place... kinda smokey though... Posts: 14 Credits: 0 Spent time on board: - Rep Power: 4	hear are some cool poems that i found off the enternet. I'M GLAD I'M A MAN I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe. I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese. I don't btch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts. I can get where I want to - north,south,east, or west. I don't get wasted after only 2 beers,* And when I do drink I don't end up in tears. I won't spend hours deciding what to wear. I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair. And I don't go around checking my reflection in everything shiny from every direction. I don't whine in public and make us leave early, and when you ask why get all bitter and surly. I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing. I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring. I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back. I don't carry our differences into the sack I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you or think every guy out there's trying to steal you. I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too. I know what the time is and I know what to do. And I honestly think its a privilege for me to have these two balls and stand when I pee. I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball. It's more fun than dealing with women after all. I won't cry if you say it's not going to work. I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk. Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure. I won't assume it's permanent by any measure. Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see. I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery. *I don't get all btchy every 28 days. I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise. I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true. I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you! hear is another I'M GLAD I'M A WOMAN I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am. I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam. I don't brag to my buddies about my erections. I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions. I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown. And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down. I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt. My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut. And I don't go around "re-adjusting" my crotch. And yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch. I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind. I'm a woman you see - I'm just not that kind! I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing. I don't have body hair like shag carpeting. It dosen't grow in my ears or cover my back. When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack. And what's on my head dosen't leave with my comb. I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome. Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side. I'm a woman, you know - I've got far too much pride! And I honestly think it's a privelege for me, to have these two boobs and squat when I pee. I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball. I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal. I won't tell you my wife just does not understand, or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band. Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep, then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep! Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see. Forget all about that old pnis envy.* I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks. *Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dck. I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true. I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!** i did the man 1 for school with my sexest LA teacher and got lunch detention for a week.

02-11-2005, 06:27 PM	#2 (permalink)
Foog Status: F* SLIMP Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: C:\Program Files\Adobe\Photoshop CS 2.exe Posts: 2,962** Credits: 20 Spent time on board: - Rep Power: 10	pretty sexist crap...

02-11-2005, 10:34 PM	#3 (permalink)
fortunecookieX Status: Forum Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 76 Credits: 0 Spent time on board: 0:00:43 Hours Rep Power: 5	you should make one about those half man half woman i forgot what you call them.anyways nice peoms

02-12-2005, 01:24 AM	#4 (permalink)
Midnight Fenrir Status: Newcomer Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: a magical place... kinda smokey though... Posts: 14 Credits: 0 Spent time on board: - Rep Power: 4	yes this is very sexist but i wasnt the one who made them. but a haph man haph woman i think is called a hermafradite (not sure about spelling just sound it out)

02-12-2005, 07:33 AM	#6 (permalink)
Midnight Fenrir Status: Newcomer Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: a magical place... kinda smokey though... Posts: 14 Credits: 0 Spent time on board: - Rep Power: 4	hey i get plenty of death threts at school so ya im most likly guna die soon. but o well if some 1 tries to kill me then im takin them with me. i bring a 6 inch swichblade to school for pretection lol.