I do not know how to say all this...but I need to go to Tennessee for a final visit with my Mom and also to see my sister and her family.


Mom has maybe a few months...I will be gone 9 days. Funeral arrangements are already made and she will be laid to rest next to my Dad in Texas.

When this happens I will be gone as well,but will let you all know.
I am leaving in a few hours so take care of the kids for me yall.

if your mom has a few months to live i would suggest using those last few months of hers to be with her family 24/7

<From my laptop...there is no chance in hell of that happening. I am doing what is needed and not the extreem. When you have your OWN family ,you may POSSIBLY someday understand.

Life goes on and I can not help Mom...I chose to be there for MY kids that still need me.

if thats what u want. I'd be with math on this one since im very close with my mom. My family would understand and be there with me. They'd definitly know their grandma.

It's Pam's mother not your own, let her make her own decisions.
I'm sorry to hear this though Pam, hope your alright. Looking forward to your return, and don't worry everything will be taken care of here.

hence the if thats what u want...

I am not close to my Mom.....never have been,,,LONG story...she ruined chances of that my whole life.....my sister is adopted,,,she has 4 biological sisters that she does not claim.

I DID take care of my Mom 7 years ago for 9 months and away from my own kids AND around the clock.
That crap is not happening again,because MY kids suffered.

My sister has ALWAYS been closer to our Mom and has cared for her the last few years.I have always been in the awkward position of being the A.first born...and B.middle child.....
Truly a no win situation,when you have no privilages but are expected to be perfect.
I made a 2 day trip to come say goodbye.

I would NEVER have come if my sister had not wanted me so badly. I am here for HER and to help her family...period.

well its normal to not be close to your mom, i am not close to mine. and it will stay that way.

i agree with all your decisions layed out in your perspectivel..(if that makes any sense). People are all different.

While I love my Mom...I see her for what she is and always has been.She has used up everyone around her for years on end,,,,,now that she is dying,I hope she does not suffer overly much,but she brought it on her self.

The cancer is deeply into her major organs and the Dr. just TODAY...deemed her too weak for Chemo.

And she lies to him about what she eats......that's really helpfull........................

pride issues? I have some pride issues my self.

Pride is only a single aspect of it,but yes...she is and always has been her own biggest fan. At this point in time she just does not remember from one moment to the next what she did...is doing...has eaten...so she tells him what he wants to hear.
The tests and blood work get the truth.

What I accomplished on this trip was just to give my sister a break.I kept her kitchen clean,I washed dried folded and put away all the laundry.I kept all the animals fed and watered(she has a LOT it's a farm)
I kept the floors swept and mopped...I did the shopping for groceries and cooked.I cleaned the bathrooms and made the beds.

My sister took Mom to Dr.s appointments,and dealt with all of Mom's drama.So I ran the house for her as a break.