Children and Grandchildren - Blizzard Sector

**Pamela** · 09-05-2007, 10:59 PM

Children and GRANDCHILDRENTo those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own,
grandchildren,
nieces,
nephews,
or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend
to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth,
God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was
"DON'T! "

"Don't what?"
Adam replied."Don't eat the forbidden fruit."
God said.

"Forbidden fruit?
We have forbidden fruit?
Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!"

"

No Way!"

"Yes way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!"

said God.

"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so!"

God replied,
wondering why He hadn't stopped
creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later,
God saw His children having an apple break
and He was ticked!
"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?"
God asked.
"Uh huh,"
Adam replied.
"Then why did you?"
said the Father.

"I don't know,"
said Eve.

"She started it!"
Adam said.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them,
God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own.

Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,
don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children,
what makes you think it would be
a piece of cake for you?THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !

1. You spend the first two years of their life
teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend
the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward
for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why
some animals eat their young.
/FONT>

4. Children seldom misquote you.

In fact,
they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes,
but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY:
Be nice to your kids.
They will choose your
nursing home one day.
AND FINALLY:
IF YOU ! HAVE A LOT OF TENSION
AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS
ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:
"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN"
AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!

(Mom once more)

Majik1911 · 09-06-2007, 12:18 AM

**Phallock** · 09-06-2007, 04:04 PM

Hmm, let's see, your mom sent this to you? her child? Could there be a hidden message there someplace?

Thanks for the laugh, I have 4 children, no grand kids yet (and probably not anytime soon).

**Pamela** · 09-06-2007, 04:27 PM

LMAO Yah she sent it...I am looking into nursing homes ~.0....

09-05-2007, 10:59 PM	#1 (permalink)
Pamela Status: A Light in your Darkness Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Florida Posts: 5,314 Tournaments Joined: 0 Tournament Wins: 0 Credits: 374 Spent time on board: :0:0 Hours Rep Power: 16	Children and GRANDCHILDRENTo those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students... here is something to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was "DON'T! " "Don't what?" Adam replied."Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said. "Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!"" No Way!" "Yes way!" "Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God. "Why?" "Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked! "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked. "Uh huh," Adam replied. "Then why did you?" said the Father. "I don't know," said Eve. "She started it!" Adam said. "Did not!" "Did too!" "DID NOT!" Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY! If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?THINGS TO THINK ABOUT ! 1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. /FONT> 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. 5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in. ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day. *AND FINALLY: IF YOU ! HAVE A LOT OF TENSION* AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!! (Mom once more) __________________ A Light in your Darkness...always there...and burning!! Last edited by Pamela; 09-05-2007 at 11:13 PM..

09-06-2007, 12:18 AM	#2 (permalink)
Majik1911 Status: Newcomer Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: The Gooch Posts: 36 Tournaments Joined: 0 Tournament Wins: 0 Credits: 1 Spent time on board: 10:32:15 Hours Rep Power: 2	Lol

09-06-2007, 04:27 PM	#4 (permalink)
Pamela Status: A Light in your Darkness Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Florida Posts: 5,314 Tournaments Joined: 0 Tournament Wins: 0 Credits: 374 Spent time on board: Days and :0:0 Hours Rep Power: 16	LMAO Yah she sent it...I am looking into nursing homes ~.0.... __________________ A Light in your Darkness...always there...and burning!!

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09-06-2007, 04:04 PM	#3 (permalink)
Phallock Status: *** Elder Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 736** Tournaments Joined: 0 Tournament Wins: 0 Credits: 28 Spent time on board: 1 Day and 1:58:17 Hours Rep Power: 5	Hmm, let's see, your mom sent this to you? her child? Could there be a hidden message there someplace? Thanks for the laugh, I have 4 children, no grand kids yet (and probably not anytime soon).