Damn Texans!

**Pamela** · 03-20-2007, 01:57 PM

Texans in Heaven...

Gabriel came to the Lord and said,
"I have to talk to you.
We have some Texans up here who are
causing problems.
They're swinging on the pearly gates,
my horn is missing, and they are wearing
T-shirts instead of robes; there's barbecue sauce
and picante sauce everywhere, especially
all over their T-shirts; their dogs are riding
in the chariots, and chasing the sheep;
they're wearing baseball caps and cowboy
hats instead of their halos.
They refuse to keep the stairway to heaven
clean, and their boots are marking and
scratching up the halls of wisdom.
There are watermelon seeds and pig feet
bones all over the place.
Some of them are walking around with just
one wing; they refuse to walk and insist on
bringing their horses with them."

The Lord sighed, "Texans are Texans,
Gabriel.
Heaven is Home to all my children.
If you want to know about real problems,
call the Devil."

The Devil answered the phone,
"Hello? Damn, hold on a minute."
The Devil returned to the phone,
"O.K., I'm back.
What can I do for you?"

Gabriel replied, "I just want to know what
kind of problems you're
having down there."

The Devil said, "Hold on again.
I need to check on something."
After about 5 minutes the Devil returned
to the phone and said, "I'm back.
Now what was the question?"

Gabriel said, "What kind of problems are
you having down there?

The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this....
Hold on."
This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes.
The Devil returned and said,
"I'm sorry Gabriel, I can't talk right now.
Those damn Texans have put out the fire
and are trying to install air conditioning!"

**Ares** · 03-20-2007, 02:06 PM

lol
this is great :)

**Phallock** · 03-20-2007, 04:48 PM

Nice!

**Money$hot** · 03-20-2007, 06:16 PM

I tried to Spam URLs. I am completely retarded. People like me should know better than to try and Troll these forums. I should be tared, feathered, and beaten with the moron stick. I am utterly incompetent.

He means he laughed,and we fixed his sig so he can actually post. ~Pamela

03-20-2007, 01:57 PM	#1 (permalink)
Pamela Status: A Light in your Darkness Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Florida Posts: 5,273 Credits: 292 Spent time on board: :0:0 Hours Rep Power: 16	Texans in Heaven... Gabriel came to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you. We have some Texans up here who are causing problems. They're swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing, and they are wearing T-shirts instead of robes; there's barbecue sauce and picante sauce everywhere, especially all over their T-shirts; their dogs are riding in the chariots, and chasing the sheep; they're wearing baseball caps and cowboy hats instead of their halos. They refuse to keep the stairway to heaven clean, and their boots are marking and scratching up the halls of wisdom. There are watermelon seeds and pig feet bones all over the place. Some of them are walking around with just one wing; they refuse to walk and insist on bringing their horses with them." The Lord sighed, "Texans are Texans, Gabriel. Heaven is Home to all my children. If you want to know about real problems, call the Devil." The Devil answered the phone, "Hello? Damn, hold on a minute." The Devil returned to the phone, "O.K., I'm back. What can I do for you?" Gabriel replied, "I just want to know what kind of problems you're having down there." The Devil said, "Hold on again. I need to check on something." After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone and said, "I'm back. Now what was the question?" Gabriel said, "What kind of problems are you having down there? The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this.... Hold on." This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes. The Devil returned and said, "I'm sorry Gabriel, I can't talk right now. Those damn Texans have put out the fire and are trying to install air conditioning!" __________________ A Light in your Darkness...always there...and burning!!

03-20-2007, 02:06 PM	#2 (permalink)
Ares Status: ///M Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: CA Sacramento Posts: 2,604 Credits: 351 Spent time on board: 1 Week, 4 Days and 16:38:30 Hours Rep Power: 9	lol this is great :) __________________ Free CD keys/Items

03-20-2007, 06:16 PM	#4 (permalink)
Money$hot Status: Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: In a house Posts: 88 Credits: 1 Spent time on board: 9:05:21 Hours Rep Power: 2	I tried to Spam URLs. I am completely retarded. People like me should know better than to try and Troll these forums. I should be tared, feathered, and beaten with the moron stick. I am utterly incompetent. He means he laughed,and we fixed his sig so he can actually post. ~Pamela Last edited by Pamela; 03-22-2007 at 10:31 AM.

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03-20-2007, 04:48 PM	#3 (permalink)
Phallock Status: *** Elder Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 736** Credits: 28 Spent time on board: 1 Day and 0:53:55 Hours Rep Power: 5	Nice!